Your Life Should Reflect Your Values — Not Your Bad Habits: My thoughts on aligning your actions with your values
We all have a version of ourselves we want to be…
Who cooks real food instead of reaching for takeout.
Who walks to the store instead of driving a mile.
The person who buys less and repairs more.
Who chooses reading a book over scrolling Instagram.
But then… life happens. We get tired, we get busy, we forget. And little by little, our daily routines start drifting away from the values we actually care about.
If you’re anything like me, that gap between what you believe and how you live can feel uncomfortable — sometimes it just feels like I’m failing, or that I should just accept that this is who I am and give up. But here’s the thing I try to remind myself: that discomfort isn’t failure. It’s your values trying to remind you who you really are.
Living a life that is happy, healthy, and meaningful isn’t about perfection. It’s about alignment — bringing your habits back in line with your deeper beliefs.
It’s about designing a life that feels right on the inside, not just looks good on the outside (which, let’s admit.
And it’s not easy. But here are…
Some steps I think might help.
- Define Your Values
A happy/healthy/meaningful life doesn’t look the same for everyone.
For some, it means growing food. For others, it’s biking to work, or refusing fast fashion, or mending what’s torn.
The goal isn’t to fit an idealized version of what someone else’s values tell you are right — it’s to live your own values more fully.
Ask: What actually feels meaningful to me? That’s where you’ll find motivation that lasts.
- Notice Where You’re Out of Alignment
Change starts with being honest. You can’t help yourself if you’re not honest with yourself. Get truthful (not judgmental, just curious). Ask yourself: Are there any behaviors that make me uncomfortable? Anywhere my daily choices clash with my values? Anything you do that you regret later?
Maybe you hate having so much stuff, but online shopping has become a weekly dopamine hit.
Maybe you want to be healthier, but you find yourself buying bags of Doritos and ice cream at the supermarket.
Be kind to yourself – these aren’t signs you’ve failed — they’re opportunities to realign. Pick just one thing and decide to act differently this week. And pay attention to how you feel after the change (and also how you DON’T feel…hey, I’m not feeling that guilt I usually feel this week!). Even small changes are powerful when they’re consistent.
- Build Identity, Not Just Habits
Habits can change when your sense of identity changes.
Instead of saying, “I should buy less supermarket, plastic-wrapped food,” try saying, “I’m the kind of person who makes use of the bags I have and values healthy, locally grown food.”
That subtle shift rewires how you see yourself — and your actions naturally follow.
Don’t try for perfection. Just be someone who cares, and who shows it through what you do. That’s enough to make a difference.
- Celebrate Progress, Not Perfection
Every time you make a more conscious choice, no matter how small, you’re voting for the kind of world you want to live in.
You’re proving that your values matter more than convenience, habit, or habit-driven comfort.
And over time, those small choices add up to a life that feels deeply congruent — a life that reflects what you actually stand for.
In the End
Your life should reflect your values — not your bad habits.
And every day, you have so many chances to close that gap, even if it’s just a little.
When your actions and your beliefs point in the same direction, life doesn’t just become more happier, healthier, and more meaningful — it becomes more whole.
And most importantly, more you.
